Miraculously Managing to Get the Job After Flying By the Seat of Your Pants in An Interview

The only thing worse than looking for a job is actually finding one. As Morrissey once wailed, “I was looking for a job and then I found a job and heaven knows I’m miserable now.” While, sure, you tell yourself you should be employed so that you can be a “productive” member of society and not feel guilty for being so naturally fly every morning when you wake up, you don’t really want one–or expect to get one.

Most harrowing of all, of course, is when you’ve lied heavily about your qualifications, and your interviewers actually believe you when you say you know how to balance accounts and “troubleshoot” just about any issue–financial, technological or otherwise. But you go with it because you figure, hey, there’s no way they would be naive enough to hire me for this role. So when they do, the expression on your face is tantamount to Donald Trump’s, being like, “Whoa, whoa, I didn’t actually want this.” And once you’ve been overtly caught in the lies you’ve told, you’ll suddenly realize the value of underachievement.