Office Booty

Like golfer’s booty, an office booty has an extremely bulbous, protruding shape. And, somewhat also like golfer’s booty, office booty stems from a general lack of activity or physical exertion. It can start out slowly or come on suddenly, kind of like poverty.

When you first begin to notice it, you will tell yourself that it’s just a result of wintertime sadness, but then the summer will come and it somehow appears meatier than ever. You realize your ass is practically spilling out of both sides of your chair and that you’ve succumbed to a common symptom of working in an office for more than a year: looking like a troll. Office booty, however, can be avoided if you skip the Midtown feeding frenzy and start investing in some Lululemon clothes.