The Best Shits You’ll Ever Take Are the Ones at Work

What could be more satisfying than taking a shit while on the company’s time? It is one of the few, most subversive ways to take your dignity back (yes, shitting leads to dignity). Not only do you finally get more than a few moments to yourself, but you can also feel free to tell people what you were doing if asked why you were away from your desk so long. They then tend to leave you alone for the remainder of the day.

You see, taking a shit is cathartic in general, but when added to the fact that it’s the only time of your day that’s really just for yourself at work, it takes on a higher level of spirituality. You can just sit there in silence or you can troll the internet for news, porn, etc. Yes, to relieve oneself at work is the only way to find quiet in the storm, and to express what you truly feel about having to go back to your cube.