Voting As An Excuse to Leave Work

Is there any better excuse than patriotism to leave the workplace? Apart from jury duty and/or crippling diarrhea, not really. Not only will your boss be unable to refute your undeniable right to express your need for a new president to help pillage your paycheck, but he or she will also view you as a “respectable” citizen who genuinely cares about this country–when all you really care about is an escape from the cube at any cost.

With the ability to tell your master that you’re going to be late because of the long line at the polling station or that you had to spend an extra amount of time deliberating on who to vote for because of extreme indecision, you can more than likely miss roughly four hours of work and get away with it. So go ahead, be on blast about voting–it’s the one day every four years you’re exempt for caring about something else more than your job.