The Excitement of Fresh Off The Boat Co-Workers

The only thing worse than loathing your job is being around someone who is really into theirs. This person (or, if you’re very unlucky, persons) tends to be the type who is fresh off the boat, either in terms of work experience and/or just arriving to the job/city. He or she will be thrilled by the mere fact that they were able to get a job with a starting salary of 60K in “the big city”–though, to be honest, this is poverty line level in NYC.

The plucky attitude and eagerness to learn on the part of “new hires” will likely drive you to the brink of insanity, especially if you’re the one who’s forced to train them in their so-called role, which is really just an extension of everyone else’s role: sitting at a desk and pretending to type. Nonetheless, their excitement over the novelty of a new job is liable to persist for the first three to six months, when the carrot dangle of getting health insurance continues to keep them wet about dragging themselves to the cube every morning. But oh, how much satisfaction you’ll feel when they start acting like just another boat slave on the ship that ain’t never gettin’ off fresh again.